I had an interesting conversation with my 11-year-old after school pick up. It went like:
“I have a big life at the moment!”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean lots of happening, busy.”
“O, ok. so, is it good busy or too much?”
“It is good busy... I’m happy for that... but… Yea many things happening, uh...”
Make sure that you have a time to listen to your little people. They are usually do not want to open up when we ask them questions like:
“How was school?... What is new? What did you do today?”
They will open and start conversation at most unusual time when you least expected. But you should be prepared for that and try to drop whatever you do, and listen actively. Only, when they know that you are interested in what they have to say to you, kids will open and talk.
We should make sure and clarify what they trying to tell us or share with us. Do not miss that opportunity to get more insights about your children’s thoughts and feelings. Actively listen, prod and encourage them to go on with explanation.
SIMPLE LISTEN AND SHARE THE LOAD WITH YOUR CHILD!
You want to make sure that you can be there, emotionally present, for your kids if they need re-assurance, clarifications, or just simple hug.
We do not want them to be overwhelmed, stressed, and feel that they have to resolve all the issues and problems of this World.
Just think how do you feel and act when you as adult are overwhelmed and stressed! I am sure that you do not want your kids to feel that way.
If there are some problems in the school - try to help, resolve, or talk to the teacher.
If there are so many after school activities that they are enrolled in, re-consider together and see what are the some that could be dropped and others that your child mostly enjoy.
Children do not need to learn everything at once. There is plenty of time in their life for another sport of musical instrument.
And remember, every child is individual and totally different to other. Do not compare! Kids do not like when you compare them with other kids, or give them examples how some other kid doing well in certain area.
They hate to be compared and they are jealous that you are thinking that some other kid is doing better.
Let them have some free afternoons for play and some time with family. Kids learn so much while they playing with other kids or adults, outside in the nature or fun games at home with family.
Children are our future but right NOW they need us, our presence, understanding, re-assurance and lots of hugs!